The Café by the Black Sea
by Marin Angel Lazarov
I am sitting in a café. A café on the Black Sea coast. It is evening. We are sitting at the bar, five people, and there are another ten people at the tables and by the sea. People here consider me to be the coolest, most enlightened person. I talk to everyone, teach them to raise their vibrations, follow the path of change, etc.
The Woman from the Sea
And suddenly, a woman comes out of the sea, looking about 45 years old. It is clear that she is not just a woman. She radiates something. And then I realise that compared to her, I am nobody. Just a trifle. A boy.
I continue to watch. She comes out of the water, and everyone sticks to her like flies to light: fish, insects, some animals running out of the bushes, birds flying in, all the people sitting down pay attention to her, someone even approaches her. This irritates me even more, increasing my feeling of helplessness, some kind of internal struggle, how to show her my achievements, to say that I too...
She comes out and walks along the shore, passes me, but... stops. I realise that everything I'm thinking is written in my eyes. And she noticed it all a long time ago and knows it. She came up to me, behind the bar, and just looked me in the eyes.
Love as a Tool
I sensed, felt and understood her thoughts. She spoke simply, without words, the words just came to my mind:
"You see, you even started using Love as a tool to feel superior to others. You sought it, but all you got was a way to compare yourself to others, to compare yourself to your advantage, thinking that you are so great, so kind, so loving, and that everyone else around you is so pathetic, so low, not yet enlightened, not yet transformed from evil and darkness. Of course, in your Love, you consider yourself above them and them unworthy. That is how you turned Love into a tool for self-gratification."
I suddenly realised that I had nothing to do with LOVE. It was just another toy in the hands of the mind, in the hands of the ego.
"The path to LOVE is Integrity."
The Great Illusion
I said to her: "That's what I tell everyone — know integrity. The whole world is One, there is no evil and no good, everything is the same. Everything is Unity. One! There is no division. Step out of the distance. Everything we see is an illusion. We live under the veil of illusion."
She said: "These are just words. You yourself do not understand what you are talking about. That is, you say, perhaps, the right words, but without understanding and in delusion. What is an illusion? You simply believe that illusion is a distorted perception of the manifested world."
"The illusion is that you perceive the external world and your internal world as different. The ILLUSION is the very existence of the external world. It does not exist. All that exists is you yourself."
Everything is You
"When you do not just realise this, but act accordingly. Not separating yourself from those around you, but considering them to be you. Not considering this fish or stone to be separate from you. Everything that surrounds you is your world, that is, yourself."
"If it seems to you that there is someone or something in your world who or which is the bearer of evil, destruction, decay, death, bad, unworthy, low — it is all yourself. That is who you are. You created it. Everything, everything, everything! And it is up to you, not someone else, to change it."
"Free yourself from the illusion — accept that everything you perceive is your world, it is you, it is your Self."
And tears poured out of me. Inside myself, I began to ask forgiveness from everything and everyone, for everything.
The Path to Love
She continued: "And when you see yourself in everything you perceive, forgiving everything you have done, forgiving yourself, asking forgiveness from your creation, you will come closer to LOVE. Because what can you do with yourself, your beloved? Love."
"Then you will love yourself, that is, the whole world as you perceive it. And as soon as you see the shadow of condemnation, forgive and love. And you will see changes. You will realise that what you condemn in others, you condemn in yourself. And by forgiving it, by loving it, you will change yourself and the whole world."
"Everything that the 'outer' world gives you is actually Love. There is no evil or malicious intent in it. It seems painful, destructive, evil, dark, and bad to you only because you have what you call karma — a record of a lesson you have not learned."
"Therefore, forgive everyone. Ask for forgiveness. For everything you see in your world, in your surroundings, in your reality as 'bad' and evil. Untie this karma. Transform everything into Love."
My tears flowed like a bucket. I was sobbing.
The Light Within
After calming down a little, I asked: "What is this light that everyone has flocked to and still remains in? Why don't I have it? What is it?"
She replied: "You see, I always remain in Love and Forgiveness. That is why all beings and creatures strive to enter my world, into what I perceive. Not because they want to 'sunbathe' in the rays of my light, because in reality it is not light."
"My light is a change in myself. It is because, upon entering my perceived world, they become part of it, they merge into the healing process, because I pay attention to them, see their 'problems' and change myself, and then they change."
"Look at the people around you. Look at yourself. You have already become different. Because you found yourself in the world I perceive, you have healed, you have already changed. Because I have changed."
Beyond the Mind
"Stop trying to understand everything with your mind; you won't understand anything that way. It has other tasks. Discard your mind, do not try to explain everything logically. Stop generating thoughts and words."
"During this whole conversation, I simply asked you all for forgiveness, forgave you and loved you all. All the words and thoughts that were born in you are your words and thoughts. It is you yourself. I did not say anything to you. I did not put anything into you. This awareness was born within you."
"Simply because I changed myself, because you entered my world, you changed too, as part of my world. Just start living like this. Don't think. The mind is not helpful here. Just forgive and love. Love and forgive."
"Everyone and everything you see, hear, feel... everything! All of yourself. All of yourself! I thank you and all of you for the opportunity you gave me to change myself."
She came out from behind the counter and walked away, continuing on her way.
Awakening
I woke up. My reality changed. And it is still changing.
Forgive me. I am grateful to you.
I love you.